incredibly confused

I really don't know what to think or feel. One minute I'm all for trying again and going through one last ivf cycle but then i suddenly feel far too scared and would rather walk on hot coals than go through it all again. I know in many ways it is probably just fear that is making me doubt it all but i have such a strong feeling that it is never going to work, so why bother? It seems an incredibly large amount of money to spend on something that you feel is never going to work + i know that those thoughts alone are enough to stop it working anyway!? The tests results came back as expected, normal, whatever the hell that is? They don't give you anymore detail than that so I've no idea what our level of said normal is? I know it's good news that nothing is wrong but at the same time we are still left with no answers as to why the fcuk we can't get pregnant, let alone have any chance of a healthy pregnancy + baby. It is all just so hard to accept. We are a happily married couple who love each other very much, we have a good home, stable income + could offer all the love any child needs, so why us? Why are we the ones who have to struggle, go through this hell only to be heartbroken at the end once again. I know it's cliche + selfish but i can't help but ask WHY? I feel so lost + confused, my life plan was mapped out, i was happy, now it's all going wrong + i don't know who i am or who i am supposed to be anymore? I just want that happy ending everyone dreams of, why is that too much to ask for?